Class, one of my brightest students, Sueblimely, asked about my Top Five Twitter Turn-On's, and thus, I feel obliged to post these turn-on's. Of course, I'd rather be goofing off like always, but it only seems fair to write something positive to balance the negative tone of my last post, my Top Five Twitter Turn-Offs.
So Listen Up my naughty students and learn My Top Five Twitter Turn-On's:
1.My Number One Twitter Turn-On is: Twitter bios. I enjoy an enormous belly laugh every morning when I open my email to see who has followed me. The bios of many Twitter folk are so ridiculous I can't help but laugh. For example (and mind you I'm just making-up *some* of this, but not ALL of it): "I'm a former meth addict, transexual, priest, and bulimic blogger." Many such Twitter colorful characters make my day!
2. My Number Two Twitter Turn-On is: Fabulous New Acquaintances. I would never have met so many wonderful people in such a short period of time were it not for the Twitter introduction. The kindness, sweetness, and courtesies extended to me in replies have been heart-warming. Yeh, yeh...call me a sucka. Whatever. Kindness goes a long way with me. I appreciate everyone on Twitter who takes the time to either Retweet or respond.
3. My Number Three Twitter Turn-On is: Breaking News. News breaks faster on Twitter than on any other online media! If something BIG happens, post a twit--it will go viral. If I should need to post an important photo or break a story orresolve a problem, Twitter is a tool which is invaluable. This makes me feel somewhat *secure* in a strange kind of way. If the world is finally falling apart, those of us on Twitter will rapidly let each other know this valuable information, right?
4. My Number Four Twitter Turn-On is: Assessing The Zeitgeist. For those of you unfamiliar with the meaning of the word 'Zeigeist', here's the definition offered by Wikipedia, "The word zeitgeist describes the intellectual, cultural, ethical and political climate, ambiance and morals of an era or also a trend. In German, the word has more layers of meaning than the English translation, including the fact that Zeitgeist can only be observed for past events."
With millions of people using or reading Twitter, I'm able to tune into the Zeitgeist and see which way the wind is blowing--a handy-dandy tool.
5. My Number Five Twitter Turn-On is: Ease. Twitter is fast and easy, and blogging takes time and energy! With Twitter I'm zero worried if I make sense. I can quickly copy a quote from my files, post it, and then I'm on to my daily carousing. Or I can post one word if I choose to be cryptic. What's not to love about this???
Class: I know you must be wondering where I've been, and I could lie to you and tell you all sorts of b.s., but in truth, I've been studying the ins-and-outs of Twitter.
Since receiving funding last year, Twitter has rapidly grown in popularity, and now more and more followers are crowding my Inbox every day! I'm terrified to open my email now because it's clogged with Twitter followers. The munchkins of the world are now twittering away.
What's going on is a massive mainstream awareness of Twitter, and so non-techies, marketers, hustlers, and freaks of every shape are jumping onboard. Some of these new Twitter folk don't even make a post before they begin adding hundreds of people--a complete no-no in my book!
Listen Up to read My Top Five Twitter Turn-Offs, and puhhlease don't make these mistakes!
1. Do NOT DM me with a link to a freebie 'anything', gift, or course. Don't DM me to plug yourself or your company. GROAN! Unless I know you, I'll delete your DM in a NY City second. Just because I accepted you as a friend and followed you back doesn't give you the right to annoy me and tell me how effing great you are.
2. Do NOT follow me, and then after I've followed you back, you then unfollow me for I'll track your rotten a** down and immediately unfollow you. You'll have accomplished nothing with your stupid little gaming. I have a LONG memory, and I'll block ya. Ya better believe it.
3. Do NOT DM me a message to follow you on Facebook and then NOT follow me on Twitter. What kind of fool are you? Your ego needs a shrink wash, and I'm the gal to crack the whip!
4. Do NOT reply to me with stupid pick-up lines such as, for example, this one: "Tell me all about yourself. I can't wait to get to know you." Barf me out. Like I'm gonna spill the beans to a total stranger in 160 characters.
5. Do NOT leave your face off your profile. I wanna see you. If you've not even taken the time to fill out your profile with a fake face, I'm totally uninterested. Besides, you're probably a scammer.
Actually I have MORE than five turn-offs, but I'll get around to them later. Now I'm sliding into the jacuzzi with my glass of Cristal to completely forget about Twitter turn-offs. I'd rather be turned on!
My library is overflowing with metaphysical books…all of which I’ve read.
I love generous people, and I’m also generous.
Until you spend many years with me, you can’t fathom who I am.
I am single.
My sheets are professionally pressed.
Gifts of healing flow through my hands.
Falling down as a young child and enduring a bad head wound, I became very psychic.
I was adopted as a baby, but my adopted parents kept this a secret from me. I discovered this fact on my own through my psychic gifts which was later confirmed.
Every week I find something to give to someone.
I can smell an agenda or falsity a mile away for I have x-ray vision and sensing.
If someone lies to me, I don’t always call them on their lie. Karma’s a bitch. It catches up with one.
My psychic abilities have been tested by professionals, but I don’t give psychic readings.
Animals gravitate to me as I love them.
I have re-invented myself many times during this lifetime.
This is because I’ve had several near-death experiences which changed me.
My inner child is alive and well and playful.
Though I don’t consume milk products, I make the exception for ice cream cones.
Photography is one of my passions.
Pomposity as displayed by others makes me laugh.
I know enough to ask for help when I need to.
Dancing is much more fun at home with the music turned up.
I am knowledgeable about astrology, numerology, palmistry, dowsing and feng-shui.
If I didn’t live on Maui, I’d live in Ibiza.
I am very good at dealing with invasions of personal space.
I am often called a Muse.
Making people laugh brings me joy.
If I could, I would travel constantly.
I love to capture the essence of a person in portrait photography.
My birth mother was half Cherokee.
Barefoot is how you normally will see me.
If I ever marry again, I will be surprised.
I think our celebrity-obsessed culture is both hilarious and ridiculous. I like to make fun of it.
Mothers that put their children in beauty contests with heavy make-up on freak me out.
Japanese food is my soul-food, and if I start feeling ill, I eat Japanese food, and I immediately feel better.
Great artists, inventors, and humanitarians are whom I admire.
I would like to keep a flat in Paris to visit from time to time.
My best friend is my daughter.
I look a lot younger than my biological age.
De-toxing is something I do daily because of environmental pollution.
My skin has a slight tan. I don’t care for dark tans as they look fake and unhealthy.
Great beauty makes my heart beat faster.
I have met and known many kind people.
Angels are with me all the time.
My non-fiction book about dolphins was published in 1993.
Living in the mountains agrees with me.
When I modeled in my early twenties, I was anorexic.
I love the element of water and love to swim.
People give me mermaid and dolphin gifts a lot.
Collages are something I enjoy creating.
Communing with Nature is necessary for my well-being.
Trust is something you have to earn with me.
Friends tell me I’m a wonderful listener and wise counselor.
I’m a light eater.
A major requirement: I need to be surrounded by beauty.
I prefer quality food, and if I drink, I prefer quality alcohol. Actually, I like the BEST in everything.
Horses, elephants, dogs, dolphins, whales and cats are my favorites.
My goal is to get my MANY blogs to support me. If not all, at least one.
I grew up in a small Indian town in Oklahoma.
The Blog-Blond blog was born out of frustration and the learning curve of blogging innards.
I gained 15 pounds sitting all day & learning how to do html and blog, No more weight gain though. I put a stop to that after I went up a size.
All the details which go into making a GREAT blog drives me just a bit crazy.
Kuanyin isn’t my real name. Duh!
However, I have the greatest of respect for the REAL Kuan Yin.
I take photos every day, and I carry two digital cameras with me everywhere I go.
I have zero desire to be a professional photographer. I’m quite happy being an amateur.
Yes, I live on Maui. Tis true.
I’ve experienced many kinds of love in my life and continue to experience love.
Unconditional love is the best.
I’ve been known to be a bit kinky at times.
I’m working on several books, one of which is a dark humor fiction book based on Maui folk I’ve known.
I love to swing in hammocks.
Watching sunrise and sunset makes me have a happy day.
The world needs to have more balance, more fair-play, and more balanced distribution of the wealth.
We can choose the world in which we live: the mundane, the magical or the miraculous. I prefer the later.
When God handed out mechanical abilities, I was the last person in line.
I am punctual for all appointments and pay my bills on time.
I attract people who are eccentric, different, quirky, odd-ball, rebellious and weird.
Perhaps this is because I am very allowing and non-judgmental.
I like to drive fast cars and boats.
I am an Artisan type according to one of those famous tests.
I prefer silk, bamboo, hemp, cotton and linen fabrics.
World music, ambient, devotional, Celtic, and rhythm and blues music are some of my favorites.
I wanted to move far away from my dysfunctional family, so I married young to do so.
I’ve seen and experienced a lot in my life. It feels as if I’ve already lived multiple lives.
You don’t want to get on my bad side.
I distrust organized religions of all kinds, and thus, I do my own thing and go within.
Candles are a necessity in my life.
It would be easy for me to be a recluse.
My inner life is extremely rich.
I have my fair share of secrets. I don’t trust people who say they don’t have secrets.
I rarely worry.
Sometimes I can be compulsive-obsessive and experience burn-out from my work/passions.
I like a lot of variety.
I can often read other’s minds and thoughts.
I’m lucky.
Yoga and stretching feel great, and I love to stretch and move.
Before there was blogging, I wrote journals. I still write personal journals.
Delicious high-quality goat cheese is one of my power foods.
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